In Which the Subject Changes, Then Goes Back, Then Goes Back to the Second Subject

So, the Deathly Hallows trailer came out a few days ago, and I'm really scared.  I don't want this to be over.  I'm scared that the fandom won't be as large or awesome by the time I really get to be a part of it.  At the moment, my part in the fandom is watching YouTube videos, reading blogs (not lately), and stalking people on Twitter.  I want to start making videos and go to WRock concerts, and go to cons.  I'm afraid that when I finally do, people will have forgotten a bit about Harry.  There's a chance that I'll be going to LeakyCon 2011, but I'm afraid.  I'm afraid that I'll be that one girl who can't even make friends among other nerds.  That I'll just be that fat, ugly, wierd little girl standing in the corner humming the harmony to what little WRock she knows.  I don't have the money to buy CDs (my mum won't buy them for me and I'm a bit too young for a job...), so I don't know or own as much music as I would like to.  I'll be that dork that everyone just looks at and raises their eyebrows, because she is so awkward and odd.  I don't want that to happen.  I was born too late, so that I'm a good 10 years younger than a lot of the more popular fans, and I didn't really become part of the fandom until about January of this year, but I did watch alwayspureblood for a while, until I became a bit too obsessed with Terminus and stumbled across italktosnakes.  It all developed from there.  I'm not sure if the people in the fandom would like me.  Yeah, so I do have HP-loving friends, but only about five (and three of them I don't talk to as much), and they're my ONLY FRIENDS.  So, as you can tell, I'm pretty socially awkward.  My best friend, Kayla, (I say that like she's not the only one that reads this) doesn't get why I can't just walk up to the guy I like and start  conversation with him.  I'm too afraid that he will think I'm a freak and avoid me at all costs.  And I'm not good at talking to people about things other than Harry Potter, Doctor Who, YouTube, and music, so that limits what I could talk about.  *Sigh*  I used to be able to talk about anything, but now it's like my mind has run out of interesting topics.  I used to have a lot of friends.  How did this go from "I'll miss Harry Potter" to "I'm lame and have no friends?"  You know you're writing a blog past midnight when...